Being Broken

It is common today to hear Christians talk of their 'brokenness.' but when you listen closely, you may discover that they are talking about their wounds, the things they have suffered, not about the evil that is in them.

(Dallas Willard, 60)

Reading this quote has brought to mind a number of thoughts in my head, mostly about my own "brokenness" but also about the many revival events I have attended where people became "broken." And these revival events are not necessarily intended to be that, but are later labeled as a meeting that experienced revival. Too often I wonder if we are more tired and sorry about the symptoms of our sin rather than the sin itself. When is the last time you truly felt broken about the wicked nature lying within? Are you merely tired of the fact that you have at various times "screwed up?" Or how many times have I confessed a sin, felt sorry that I had committed it, but did not seek to make things right? These are examples of a false sense of brokenness.

True brokenness results in true repentance. Repentance is not just feeling sorry for a mistake you have made and searching out forgiveness. Repentance is the quest to do more than just make right a past wrong. It is the work of putting in place barriers, reforming a thought process, whatever it may take to prevent from ever allowing that sin to occur again. When is the last time we took part in true repentance and did not stop at the stage of confession. Confession is an act, repentance is a work. And I honestly believe repentance comes only when true brokenness occurs.

But as Willard pointed out, brokenness does not occur over just one specific act of sin, but over the nature of sin, the wickedness residing within us. Numerous times have I graced the doors of a church, walked into a sanctuary, sang the music, listened to the sermon, and left having felt no sense of my sinfulness. We are gathering to worship a Holy God. Any encounter with this God results in a complete awareness of just who we are. Note Isaiah's reaction when he came into contact. He fell flat on his face and cried out "Woe is me!"

I have spent numerous hours over the course of my life sitting in a church pew, looking at the cross perched on the wall behind the pulpit. How many times have I truly felt a sense of humbling awe while staring at that cross and the significance of what it represents? Not enough. I can certainly say that.

Entering this Easter season, I am reminded of the significance of the cross. It is easy to feel brokenness over sin when being forced to truly, deeply meditate on the cross. But this Palm Sunday, something else entered my mind. As Jesus was approaching Jerusalem, what did he do?

And when he drew near and saw the city, he wept over it… (Luke 19:41)

It is interesting that later, as Jesus enters the city, there is great pomp and circumstance over his arrival. He enters as the triumphant king. But within a week the whole city turns completely against him and crucifies him. How can this change happen? The people are blinded by their own desires. They saw him as a triumphant king about to overthrow the Roman government. Instead he came as the triumphant king about to defeat sin and death. The people were focused on their selfish desires, not on who God is and what is his mission. Being blinded to God is devastating. This is why brokenness is so vital. Brokenness opens our heart’s eye to God, removing the distractions of our own selfish desires. Our desires and sin can blind us so much that tragedy is made certain. But when we enter into brokenness, our eyes are opened, and we can celebrate God’s wonderful work in our own lives and in the world.